Reasons I Love India
Recently the New York Times published an article about the negative experiences of some Indians who went back to India after working and living in other Western countries particularly the United States. This article was widely published by other newspapers including the Times of India. The overall response of the viewers portrayed India in a very negative light for very obvious reasons (bad infrastructure, filth, poverty, corruption etc.). Indians outside of India is a closely knit group. We carry and propagate the Indian culture wherever we go. I have met very few Indians outside of India who truly hate India. But this does not mean that many of these Indians will consider going back to India.
My opinion of India evolved over time. Initially as a student in the United States I was of the view that I would not reconsider going back to India under any circumstances. But eighteen years later my feelings have changed. Indians as most of you already know have some of the highest per capita incomes of all ethnic groups in the United States. We live, work, go to school and interact with Americans who are in a similar situation. But these Americans do not represent the “average American”. Most Indians in the United States have a Bachelors degree. Many have a Masters degree. An “average American” only has a high school diploma. So although we are in America most Indians here have a “skewed” opinion of what America really is.
My views about Americans started to change once I started a small business. We provide certain security services to homes. This business has given me the opportunity to meet hundreds of customers from all sections of society every month in their own homes and places of work. What I found and encountered surprised and shocked me (I have to admit that I was and continue to be a die hard fan of the Untied States). I found certain amount of racism, meanness, coldness, self-imposed ignorance, and “me” attitude that is difficult for me to come to terms with.
Recently I was working inside a house in a very expensive neighborhood when the house owner came and asked me move a few feet from where I was standing. I looked at her puzzled and she without blinking an eye said that she wanted me to move because her wallet was near the counter where I was standing. Many of my potential customers upon seeing me at their front door have told me “to go back where I came from”. One of the incidents that I will never forget is a customer who pointed to her head and mentioned that I took longer than usual to do a job because I was from a different country and did not have the brains to do it. Unfortunately these are not isolated incidents. Incidents like these are common and happen to non-white business people all over the country every day (these feelings of hatred towards immigrants increases during bad economic times).
This experience has not only changed my opinion of Americans but also has changed my views about India. Nowhere in India have I felt anger from fellow human beings as I have in America. Racism, casteism, and other forms of discrimination also exist in India. But India is a country where about 400 million people go to bed without a good meal a day. Many of these 400 million people are living in conditions that are comparable to the Stone Age. But there is still a sense of dignity and brotherhood among human beings in India. In our day to day interactions with others we tend to keep our innermost feelings and disappointments to ourselves and do not take it on others (the lady who told me to move away from the counter later told me that she was having a bad day and that I should not to take it personally). What exists beneath all the filth, the garbage and the poverty in India is an old culture that has taught us to be nice to each other and be respectful of our parents and elders. It rewards the concept of a group over individual. These concepts are badly lacking in America (the country is currently debating whether 45 million uninsured Americans should have the right to have basic health insurance!!)
Feelings of anger, disappointment and resentment are understandable in a society where people are struggling to survive but how can it exist in a society which has everything? I think that United States is what it is because of its founding fathers. They setup a system and formulated a vision in the 17th century that was way ahead of its time. The Golden Generation (the generation that fought the World Wars) made America what it is today which is an economic and military superpower. What exists today is just a shell. What exists inside is definitely what I expected. People will still come to America chasing the so-called myth called the American dream. The American dream is just material illusion. Many of those who immigrate, particularly if you are from India or China will notice after a few years that in many ways the country you left is far superior to the country that you are trying to assimilate to. I am one of them.
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Category: News & Government
Good,will you please shout loud enough so that politicians,human rights activists can hear you loud and clear.
Just because we are a tolerant nation,we are being abused all over.
A real “eye” opener for all aspiring to go to U.S.!! but i got only 1 question for you…why dont you come back to INDIA….when you have realised its not worth chasing the “american dream” and rather have an “INDIAN DREAM”??
Thank you for taking the time to comment. The answer to your question is a little complicated. When I came here to get my Masters degree almost 20 years ago there was no comparison between India and the US. But today there is. The Indian economy (still only 1/10 the size of the American economy) is more dynamic and offers much better opportunities. But it is very difficult for me and others like me to pack up everything and leave (we have financial investments, property, education, kids, friends and family to consider). But what I mentioned in the article is a true reflection of my feelings and experiences. When you are young money is the motivating factor. When you get a little older and wiser then other factors come into play. The other factors are what I am trying to grapple with.
hi, iam a masters student in the US. what u have written is very true. the stuff that i see at school is the “skewed” america. your experience in your business seem to give a broader view. my opinion is that it is still good for indian kids to come here and other countries, get the exposure. I would have never had many of the experiences i have had here back home and i ve been here only 4 months. some things are better here and somethings are better in india. but i do think indian kids need to go out, experience a really global view point. However i do want to and will return to India and i feel that indians need to do that and we owe it to india. I can understand you saying u cant pack up and leave immediately, but i do sincerely feel that if u make an effort to do it gradually you can and if u truly want to u will. We should be a part of the change that can bring indian institutes on par with the institutions here. Trust me, I have seen enough in 4 months here to reason enough that India still lags heavily when it comes to higher education. I know it might be a little off -topic, but i was reading an article on the 25th year of bhopal gas tragedy and i felt really sad for the victims. They are my countrymen. These things always motivate me to do something for my country.
PS: these views are solely mine and no offence intended to any persons or communities.
Harish. Welcome to my site and thank you for seconding my opinion. Indian’s (particularly the younger generation) have a lot to learn from America. My intent was not to discourage people from coming to US but to present some facts that might not be obvious when you look at America from afar. Good luck in school and keep in touch.
Hey, I have read your article, I can fully understand what you are saying about USA, I am in UK , I have heard stories about such incidents but touch wood I have never been treated like that. The reson I am writing is not about what happeens in USA or UK..
But I will strongly object to where you said this doesnot happen in India, I have lived in india all my childhood,youth, came to uk about 8 years ago. I must say WE AS INDIANS ARE THE MOST RACIST, and i can argue to length over this. If a white guy says to us paki or indian we feel so bad..
But have we ever realised ( I DID NOT EITHER till i came here), how we behave ourselves, standing by the roadside in india we want to call a Rickshawala we say
“OYE BHAIYA”.. and please dont tell me the BHAIYA word is meant as brother cause it is not..
OR going to a restaurant how we call a Waiter…
What we think of humans from UP or BIHAR… I still remember , The land labour that comes to punjab for harvest .. we as land owners provide food , but when giving the food our utensils dare not touch theirs .. I remember getting told off by family elders…
How our caste system works… especialls when it comes to Hindu-sikh or Hindu-Muslim.. How we work against FEMALES in our society …
I remember the sniggering of my friends when i held the door open for someone behind me, or said thanks to someone or said sorry if i brushed against someone.. my friends in india were like i have become a gora.. But I was like this is basic atiquites
The problem is that we have come abroad , we have taken the citizenships but in our OWN heart we dont feel like that, we still call ourself indians, Heck i do the same.. But i think its wrong, we work,earn,get rich, eat, here so why do we call ourself indians.. If you know what i mean and that is what the WHITE dont like which i think is correct. When british came to india they took all the money back .. Are we not doing the same making big bucks and yet saying how this is bad or that is bad..
These are just my thoughts .. and I dont intend to OFFEND anyone.. but its worth a though what I said. IF i offend someone I am sorry in advance.
mann-bikram.blogspot.com
Bikram, Thank you for taking the time to comment. In the fifth paragraph in my article I do mention that “Racism, casteism, and other forms of discrimination also exist in India”. So I am not oblivious to that fact. Also comparing a developed society like the United States to what is going on in India is not fair. An average American is well aware of his/her rights. An average Indian is not. My point is how can a developed nation that has such a high standard of living discriminate (even against their own president).
Education and understanding of ones rights ultimately should make a big difference (unfortunately it does not in many developed nations). You can see this difference within India right now. Some of the things you mention (calling people names, eating from a different plate) are happening in parts of India but does not happen in a state like Kerala.
Hi Haris,
What you said in your reply is very true like I quote
“But it is very difficult for me and others like me to pack up everything and leave (we have financial investments, property, education, kids, friends and family to consider). But what I mentioned in the article is a true reflection of my feelings and experiences. When you are young money is the motivating factor. When you get a little older and wiser then other factors come into play. The other factors are what I am trying to grapple with. ”
This is an excellent statement of reality. Money alone is not enough for ones satisfaction. Many people abroad fail to think what amount of cultural activities they miss, their relations, functions etc. etc. Many will argue ” there are enough number of actitivities going on in US and we dont miss anything of Indi” But it is only a statement to satisfy oneself, I feel. Any way I apprecite your mail and I am totally with you on this. I have a son and a daughter in the US but I am not very happy to come and stay there permanently despite whatever good things it offers, but I like to be in India “with the alleged filth, poverty, etc.etc.”
keep writing regards
Krish
Palakkad
Reply
Welcome Krish,
My Amma and in-laws are like you. They do not want to come to the US and stay for long periods of time and I understand why. There are a lot of people like me who are thinking of returning (I wrote an article about this yesterday). Emotionally it is a tough decision.
If on is in India and is doing well both personally and professionally, he is better off living there. He need not and should not come to US. One who has come to US and stayed here for a good amount of time cannot go back to India for various reasons. I came to this country by accident very late in my life. As my children are now grown-up I cannot go back to india as they are studying in High school and college. I therefore advice some of the young who work in my team to enjoy your honey-moon here in US and go back to India when your children are small if you get any chance. Many of my young friends did go back. There is no good society or bad society. There are bad people and good people across the world. I live in a locality where there are all common blue-collared Americans. They are helpful to my family members. Some times I am surprised how they go out of their way to help me. My only suggestion to all our indian brothers and sisters is first start respecting your fellow Indian and the rest will respect you.everybody has his own small experience but better not generalize the world of occean with one’s bucket of water.
Welcome Mahan. Great words of wisdom.
The great time to make the change is when you do not have kids or if your kids are relatively young and make the adjustment.
Dear Harish
You are a great optimisit.
Have you tried to live with one of 400 million people in stoneage condition to take Indian pride?
Hello Rao,
Should I live with them to be proud of India? Is our Prime Minister proud of India?
I am surely a proud Indian and love this country as well as all the Indians despite differnces in caste, religion. It is a great country and will remain so. This was known to Brits who occupied it for a long time and governed it. They attempted to destroy the culture of India and also divided a great land in so many pieces in a planned manner i.e. Burma, Srilanka, Nepal, Pakistan, Afganistan and so on..
The old great BHARATKHAND is still leading the world in spirituality and will do so.
You may live anywhere on this mother earth but be a proud INDIAN.
Welcome Bishan and thank you for your comments. I really appreciate your sense of brotherhood. If all of us feel the same way, India would be in a much better place.
1. Why do you have a shopping link on your personal blog? This article seems to be written to attract people to your website for publicity.
2. You can always go back if you really want.
3. Offcourse USA is not your contry and not your people, they will never will be. By not leaving you are making your kids to go through the same.
Welcome Pratik.
I think you need to cheer up a little bit :)
I write articles and publish it online so that people can read it and react to it if they want to (remember we are on the Internet !!). This is exactly same as any other form of media. Of course I know that I can always go back when I want to. I am not waiting for anybody’s permission. But unlike what you think America is my country and I am attached to it just like I am attached to India. So it is not easy for me to just leave.
while i understand what u r trying to convey, i beg to differ. Anybody, going away from his home country faces racism.. i mean indians’ are abused in Kenya, i have know ppl from kenya telling this. so tht is not something new. Part of the parcel.
But, being in india all my life, i can tell u this. india can never be a Good Advanced country, simply because even educated people lack absolute civic sense, just see the so called global-IT-citizen behaving on road. The common excuse, India mein sab chalta hai! bloody non-sense..
One more thing, about being nice. have one accident and you will see that people are fighting like dogs, trying to prove that one is superior over the other..
Im no pessimist, but only stating wht i have seen, not wht wht i think..
Laws are only for stupid here in India!
I think Racism is a human weakness. Whether Indians go abroad or foreigners visit India they are likely to encounter racism from those people who are ignorant. I am surprised at the amount of racism that is still existing in the American society because of the level of education, knowledge and information Americans have at their fingertips as compared to an average Indian.
I am a little more optimistic about India than you are. I have lived in India for about 20 years and I know what you are talking about. But I have seen a lot of improvement in the past couple of decades.
“india can never be a Good Advanced country, simply because even educated people lack absolute civic sense, just see the so called global-IT-citizen behaving on road. The common excuse, India mein sab chalta hai! bloody non-sense..”
I disagree with this, when these global IT Indians goes to west, they will behave properly, only because, there are strict rules. Here we dont have any strict laws, so people are taking advantage of that..
Good point Jaya. People misbehave because they know there are no consequences. In India many people do not follow the traffic laws because you rarely get caught and even if you get caught you can bribe the police. That will not happen in America.
@jaya and hari.
So we need laws to behave then?
So a guy riding his bike on the footpath has to be stopped by law, a guy spitting pan cannot be blamed then. There should be something called self-consciousness.
Throwing garbage on road, taking your pets out for nature calls on the road sides in one’s society, is not a law and order problem, its an attitude problem. My neighbour who owns multiple high-end cars does not even have the basic sense of all this? So how is law to blame? certainly, you can’t have a policeman at his doorstep all the time. again, all you need is a bit of self-consciousness.
Agree to certain extent that law enforcement too is necessary, but can’t we use our brains a bit? esp ppl who are supposedly globe totters?
disclosure: I work for the IT sector, so pls dont think im against the IT folks. I’m concentrating more on IT folks, only because they have seen the better side of it.
Ajay,
If there are no repercussions for their actions then some people behave the way they want. This is not an issue in India alone. In America in the suburbs, police are well funded and there is a lot of support for them. This means less crime and a very well behaved population. Go to any city and you will immediately notice a lot of difference. There will be a lot of trash on the streets, drug dealing and other criminal activities.
one more thing let me just narrate that happened when i was on a trip with my colleagues:
after having some snack in the vehicle, my colleague just disposed of the plastic cover right out of the vehicle, without any hesitation.. wht do we have to say for tht? law problem or attitude problem?
It is called a lack of civic sense. You will also find it in cities in the US to some extent. But most Indians very quickly adapt (after getting fined or pulled over a few times).
yeah civic sense would’ve been a better word. Anyway, all tht i said still hold good, and hopefully some agree with it! :)
The reason we all love india because we are all born in India and raised there. Sons-of-the-soil and the brain washing, the day in and day out education, the patriotic repertoire baggage we carry every day are the reasons. You ask the same question to your son or daughter who is either born here or raised here and not conditioned by you probably you may get a different answer. What ever length of time you may live in a forEign country and take the citizenship you will still be an Indian You may not say the same about your children and grand children and so on and so forth.
Welcome Mahan.
I agree with you entirely.
Maybe we should have a law that prohibits parents from teaching their kids about religion or about country. It will be a lot better world!!
I quite agree with you; most of my friends who are settled in ‘phoren’ have no commitment to anything other than themselves. It is only a question of what can you do for me? Be it parents, relatives or friends, once you have served your purpose, you will be dumped. (As they say, ‘ it is time to move on ‘). I do agree that there are a lot of drawbacks in India too but it is a ‘human’ country – if you know what I mean.
Welcome Jayant.
There is a lot of individualism in the West. You have to think about yourself first before anything else. But it is not as simple as that. Countries like the United States lead the world in charitable contributions and they really step up to the plate when there are tragedies in the world.
human country!? sorry bro..not as much as you think it is. you should have an altercation with a person to know how human we are!
look at the govt offices.. i mean, corruption even in flood relief?? human?? sorry..
we lack the basic deceny to deal with others when in conflict. how many a fights we have seen when there is none needed?
im not saying that we are animals :), nut just to say we are more human than the US ppl. nope.
How many of us go to disaster relief. With indians too its always Me first.
I agree with Ajay. Again these are based on individual experiences. No country is absolutely free from malice. The charity done by foreigners is with ulterior motive. Mainly for Proselitization. In India we have as many Gods and people tell so many lies very easily. corruption is rampant. People are not at all tolerant. May be too much population is a reason. In US there is sophisticated corruption like Insurance and on the name of free stuff. There are organizations like RSS which go for disaster relief without any personal agenda. Illiteracy is a boon for our politicians. Lopsided development in cities vs villages is a big negative factor in India. We can give many examples of positives and negatives. Over all US is better than India.
Mahan,
I do not believe that foreigners perform acts of charity with ulterior motives but the RSS does it without any personal agenda. I know that people in the West give millions of dollars for Haiti, Tsunami or floods in Pakistan without knowing anything about those countries or the religious affiliations. They give because they hear stories about people suffering.
United States is a very rich and a very literate nation. It has very tough laws and an equally through enforcement of these laws. India is largely poor and we are a long way away. So we cannot compare the two countries using measures like corruption, literacy, divide between cities and villages.
What I find odd is the amount of animosity (putting it mildly) that exists in the American society towards minorities (race, ethnicity, religion, language etc.) This situation gets worse as you move away from the major cities.
FYI: A decision to build a very small temple near my house was opposed tooth and nail by local residents. There are at least 10 churches within a 2 mile radius of the site for this temple. Such opposition from local communities is very common in the US.
Hari -
I agree with you. The people who donate funds for the victims do not know how it is being used. Most of the charity goes through Church Affiliates. That again mostly goes through the NGO associations in India managed by the Converted christian community whose main agenda is conversion. I went to india recently after 8 years. I-n AP i have seen mushroomed churches sprawling along every road all over. Courtesy Foreign funds and YSR, the late CM of the state. Here The American community Opposes the Temple constructuin. Even such a big establishment like thwe venkatewshwara temple in Bridgewater, NJ has to face lot of problems for their expansion and opening the road from Route 206. Some Indian community has purchased a church property in Raritan, NJ and converting it to a temple. One of the neighbors openly expressed her dis-pleasure about this. The organizers have requested her to attend the inaguration ceremony first hand and told her that hinduism is a peaceful entity and there will be no problems. This kind of religiuos problems are common because most of the people in US or in India are not highly educated. I have some American friends, they don’t go to church saying that the pastors are un-reasonable and ask for envelopes of money and service everytime they visit for the Mass. I think instead of a binding factor the religion is day by day becomming a divider.
Mahan … I live about an hour and half from the Bridgewater Temple and have many friends in the area. Your comment reminded me that I should visit the temple sometime soon :)